How to Eat your Boots

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How to Eat your Boots

Attention, Guardsmen!

Due to continued hostilities on Vigilus, some aggressive restructuring of your rationing system has been required in order to better provide nutrients to the fighting forces of the Astra Militarum. If you are stationed in a PRIORITY VERMILLION ALPHA war zone, good news! You can expect no disruption to your supply of delicious, nutritious, extra-chunky corpse starch.

If you are stationed anywhere else, we have even better news! We?ve authorised the consumption of your own boots in order to compensate for any shortfall in rations.* Instructions follow:

There you have it, Guardsman! We hope you look forward to your culinary creations.

++Thought For The Day: Hope is a luxury.++


* This is a less improbable solution than you may think ? thanks to the miraculous efficiency of Imperial recycling programs, your standard-issue combat boots share 97% of their material composition with the average field ration.

** Consuming them is not recommended unless you wish to induce a quick death in case of being captured.

*** Some soldiers recommend washing their boots beforehand. Doing so will enhance the hygiene of the final product, at the cost of potential flavour.

**** Once leftovers have cooled, they can also be used to patch up holes in your flak armour or to waterproof small items.

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